Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Losing my patience...

So, I was gonna blog about my day of taking Ryan out for lunch. For those of you who don't know, that is usually a big no no. But, I took a big girl pill and decided to try. However, that post will have to wait. Even after a good day, Ryan decided to do EVERYTHING that makes me lose my patience--in the span of about 15 min. So, here it goes...

I DO NOT WANT TO BE A PARENT THAT SPANKS. But, I sure know why people do. I'm not going to get into that whole debate. That is not my place because my job is to parent MY child. I'm not sure which bothers me more: the actual spanking, or if its the parent who spanks and then doesn't feel bad. Does that make sense? I have done some "taps" on the hand, and always feel tremendous guilt after which makes me not even want to be a tapper, or a spanker.

#1 - hitting the dogs
This is #1 because it is a safety issue. Even the nicest dog can only take it for so long. For some reason Ryan picks on our oldest dog...the family favorite (Ethan's favorite). I know that one day she is going to have enough and bite him so I am trying everything to break the habit. We have taught him "be nice." That is when he will nicely pet. He also does this to humans too, LOL. But nice is never his first choice. It is always hit or kick or stand on top of. Nikki is great about giving a warning growl and then usually goes upstairs. It breaks my heart that she spends most of her day upstairs, but I know she feels safer there. Ryan is much nicer to our other dog. Whether it is because she allows him to roll on her and drive his cars on her or if its just her nature, I don't know. She does get on his nerves if she is laying on the couch and he is trying to play there. He tries to move her. Good luck...she is 80lbs. That is when he hits his favorite.

#2 - throwing food
It took me months to get Ryan back into his highchair. Once he was off babyfood he threw whatever I gave him. I ended up sitting on the couch and shoving food into his mouth whenever he walked by. This got much worse when we moved. It took me about 2 months but I got him back in the highchair for lunch and dinner. Ethan is in charge of breakfast on the weekdays and he started putting him back in the chair too. Score one for the parents! For some reason tonight was throw your dinner night. It is even more annoying because he was standing at his chair whining to be put in. I gave him a cheesestick while I made him an english muffin pizza. Ok...I'm not gourmet. Sue me! Then every piece is hitting the floor. I offer him blueberries (one of his favs) and even those get thrown. Now, I know I should ignore it but since he goes to bed so early I'm always worried he'll wake up in the middle of the night hungry. Ethan tells me if he's hungry he will eat. I'm sure Ethan would have taken the plate from him after the first few throws and been done with it. But, then he doesn't have the overnight mommy guilt that I have!

#3 - hitting in general

If I pick him up when he doesn't want to or I remove him from a situation, he hits me. Don't love it.

Ok. Those are the main reasons I lose my patience. I've tried a modified time out with him on my lap and holding down his hands. Then I got a fat lip from him throwing his head back. I say "NO" a zillion times a day. I take stuff away. It's just one of those days I guess.


judy_cushing said...
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kalyn said...

You are a GREAT mommy Brandi. As long as you follow your heart- and do what you think is best- that is all any one can ever ask of you!

judy_cushing said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
judy_cushing said...

Sorry Brandi! My computer got all jacked up when I was making another comment and trying to fix a typo on my first, so I deleted them by accident instead of saving.
BOTTOM LINE-you ARE a great Mommy and are NOT alone. We all have moments like these.