Survival and sick

I am so partied out! Ryan's halloween party at preschool was cute, but cold. It decided to (finally) get cold over here. They had little stations set up for the kids, and they tried to do a parade but getting 21 3 yr olds to follow in a line doesn't really work. The big party here was fun, but we couldn't do any outside play due to RAIN. Again, the pregnant me is much happier in the cooler weather but 15 kids stuck inside...It all worked out. No one seemed too excited to paint (yipee) so I was able to save my floors. We made the foam halloween magnets and that was just crafty enough, and not messy. My house is a wreck, but that is fine. Ethan managed but just kept saying "thats a lot of kids." Pictures to follow.

Ryan had a runny nose yesterday which I thought was allergies, but today has an added cough so I'm guessing we have another cold. I don't think we'll be venturing out much tonight, maybe just to my parents. Kind of a bummer.

On the housing front, they countered our offer, which was expected. Now we (Ethan) has to decide what our counter is. We are so close, I hope. It would be great to be moved in by December and have time to get settled before April. I have to keep telling Ethan how much I love the house and hoping it doesn't come down to haggling over 5k, because in the long run, that is nothing. Keep the fingers crossed.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the big play group halloween/birthday party. HERE. 22 kids, 20 adults. Poor Ethan. He has no idea what he is in for! And paint will be involved. Scary. I managed to disinfect most of the toys in the playroom, and vacuum. I also went through Ryan's book basket (its a laundry basket) and took out the baby books. He even gave me permission that it was ok to give them to the baby--yater. I have a few spots to carpet clean in there (thank you to my dogs--honestly, they need to quit eating plastic and then throwing it up). Ethan's mom is coming over later, hopefully to keep Ryan occupied so I can finish decorating and cleaning up whatever needs to be cleaned up. Cuz right now half of our "L" couch is in the entry way. Not very welcoming for guests, but Ethan wanted to clean the carpets in the family room and I said YES, PLEASE. That was last weekend. You do not need to ask why the couch is still in the entry. YOU ALREADY KNOW.

I have dips for the moms, jello (in halloween shapes) for the kids, with the Chex "autumn" mix (it has m&ms and candy corn), cupcakes, goldfish and water/juice boxes. I think I'm covered. The treat boxes came from Lillian Vernon. They are shaped like pieces of cake, and when you put them all together to make the full cake it is so cute! There is an organic lollipop from Trader Joes (though I'm not sure there is really a point to buying organic from Mexico--what's up TJ's?), Yogos (which i think are gross but the kids seem to enjoy) and some halloween bubbles. Ethan is in charge of cleaning up the backyard tomorrow, in between us taking Ryan to preschool, then going back for his halloween party there. He is gonna be high on sugar!

Our bid on the house expires tonight at 5:00. Isn't it nice that the agent was just printing out the offer yesterday (tuesday) when our agent called to confirm she had received it--one of many calls she had made to her. She e-mailed it to her Sunday night. UG. The agent did say she was going to try and get the sellers to take it, especially since we are nearing the "holiday" season and people tend to quit house hunting then. Not to mention there are no other offers AND they are priced way too high. So... more waiting. I am willing to give them some extra time, but not too much because every day we lose looking at other homes...not that I want to keep looking.

Back to cleaning...wish me luck for tomorrow. Or, wish Ethan look. I hope I don't find him curled up in his car in the garage just waiting for the madness to end.

We are not defeated

Don't count us out. We put yet another offer in on a house, or if its not already in, will be in today. I had a moment of clarity yesterday (odd as of late) when I drove by one of the houses we looked at last week. It happens to be across from our agent, listed out of our range. She showed it to us because she knows it is overpriced (way overpriced--by about 40k at least). She also knows the sellers. They are divorcing and need to sell. It would be nice to deal with them instead of these banks. When I drove by I just couldn't figure out why we would let it go without at least trying. So, we put in what we think the house is worth, according to recent comps and Ethan's other research. Our agent didn't scoff at us like we were way off, so I think that is good. Its going to be hard for the sellers to stomach I'm sure, especially when its less than what they paid for the house brand new in 2002, but that is the reality of the market right now. We sold our Oceanside house as the market was starting to go down, and we took a lower price just to be done with it after 3 months on the market (and 3 months of paying a mortgage and rent). If they want and need out, they should at least counter.

The house is great, has everything we wanted. The only con is that the backyard isn't done. Nothing. Its dirt, just like when they bought the house in 2002. They either never got around to landscaping or couldn't afford it. That is another reason Ethan thought the house was way over priced. It has great upgrades: hardwood all downstairs, plantation shutters, solid surface counters in the kitchen and it is immaculate, but those almost get cancelled out when you know a backyard could cost 20-30k. We ofcourse would do it ourselves, like we have done before (we meaning Ethan and whoever he begs to help him).

I printed out the invitations to Ryan's family party today, now all I need is stamps. It is hard to find a store that sells stamps here. I don't know why. Rite Aide...no stamps. A friend offered to make all the cupcaks for Ryan's playgroup party and I said YES. That is one less thing to do. We went to Trader Joe's yesterday and I got the rest of the organic lollipops for the treat boxes. There is still much halloween decorating to do, but at least I won't have to bake anything that day--which is also the day of Ryan's preschool halloween party so I have to attend and lose some precious party prepping hours. For the family party we are doing catered deli sandwiches and pizza. Less stress for me. Ethan is cleaning the carpets as I type :)

In other grand news, Ryan has slept through the night til 6:30 for 2 nights! He was having frequent wake ups before, and the crying would make him cough...stupid allergies. The coughing would get out of control so I would have to go in there. Hopefully that is now over.

Oh...Ryan goes off track for the month of November. Uh...

On the brighter side...

Popeye's opened :) If we can't have the beach to remind us of San Diego, we can have Popeyes. Watch me put on the weight now Dr....bleep.

Nikki is doing better. Ethan got her to eat her dinner last night and breakfast this morning. No more vomiting, though she is still drinking more water than normal. I believe the liver meds are working. SIL/vet tech said we didn't need to bring her in, since we were doing what they would tell us to do anyway, and the $100 blood test probably wasn't necessary since this has happened before. So we wait. If she has another unexplained episode we'll do some further testing, and I guess its a possiblity she can be on the $80 liver meds for the rest of her life. If she is acting fine, I'm fine. I think she knows we would never let her suffer. She gets a lot of alone time with me on the couch when Ryan naps, and with Ethan at night when Ryan is asleep so I'm confident she knows we love her and trusts us to do the right thing. The funny thing is that Shelby got to eat 4x yesterday! I kept forgetting to put Nikki's food up if I left the room. Then BAM it was gone. She is so sneaky. She used to be so obvious and you could hear her chowing down. I never heard a peep. And she still thought she was gonna get dinner. As Ryan would say "silly dog."

I am trying harder to set my brain right and accept some help for Ryan's party. I realized its next Thursday and I have nothing done, not even a list, which is very unlike me. I enjoy a good list. Time has been getting away from me and I haven't felt myself. We probably missed out on bidding on 2 houses we liked just because I couldn't process everything right now. I apologized to our agent and I hope she understands. Its weird how all of a sudden normal stuff seems so hard to keep up with. This weekend I will make a list for the party, coordinate help, and relax.

Pictures to follow of Ryan at our playgroup halloween carnival. They outdid themselves. There was a mini cemetary and one of the headstones was for Martha Stewart and it said "she dug her own grave." Isn't that hysterical?

Gonna be kind of a downer...sorry

There has been a lot of stuff going on the last few weeks and it all seems to coming to a head at once, but at the same time, I hope settling down. My grandma has lung cancer. She is not or ever was a smoker. She is 78 and healthy for her age. In my whole life I don't remember her being really sick or having to be hospitalized. She works in her garden everyday, and can hoe weeds faster and better than me. Up until recently she mowed her own lawn which was almost half an acre. And, she has been caring for her daughter (my aunt) who is going through chemo for ovarian cancer (which has spread). At the time of testing and doing her lung biopsy they found out she has three blocked arteries around her heart. Now they are waiting for the oncologist to talk to the heart doctor and coordinate treatment, if any. She always said she didn't want to go through chemo, after seeing what it can do, but she is open to at least discussing it now. Surgery is not an option due to the location of the tumor. This has been bringing back feelings and memories of when my grandfather passed away 3 years ago, almost to the day. He died unexpectedly (though he was in a nursing home) 4 days before Ryan was born. Something I haven't even come to terms with yet because during the time when I should have been grieving I was having a baby and just surviving. Cancer on my dad's side of the family is rampant and its scary. Very scary. So, if you are a praying kind of person or someone who sends out good thoughts, send them out for grandma. I pray for her peace of mind and body.

Our dog Nikki is sick again. She threw up twice this morning, wouldn't eat, wouldn't move, then scarfed down water when I brought it to her--a sign of a liver/kidney issue. Again. This time she did not get into anything or eat anything bad that we know of. Believe me, its usually obvious. I called my sister in law (vet tech) to make sure I could give her the liver support meds on an empty stomach because she wouldn't eat. She also suggested some Pepcid and pain meds to hopefully perk her up. I dropped Ryan off at school, went to my pedicure appt, ran to Ride Aide for the Pepcid, and came home. She peed in the house, expected since she never went out in the morning. I cleaned that up, gave her the meds and some treats and cheese to hopefully not make her stomach any worse. Now we wait. If she is having another liver episode, this means its happening on its own, without the trigger of her injesting something bad. Which I think means we are in the beginnings of liver failure or cancer. It was only a few months ago that we went through this, agonized over possible cancer, then found out her values went back to normal after the liver support meds. I just can't have her suffer. And I can't watch her look sad.

I had more to say since I got some info on my hospital and the spinal situation, and we looked at some houses yesterday, but I think I've said enough for now. I just need a break.

Best line ever

I am a sucker for romantic movie quotes, though Tom Cruise's "you complete me" was a bit much. I tend to forget them within a few hours, but I heard something today I thought was the best line ever--and it was on TV. I started watching "Raising the Bar" on TNT. Its a new show this season and I love it. After working in a law office for 4 yrs I'm into court shows, not the CSI kind of stuff, but the actual court antics/lawyers, etc. Anyway, one of the public defenders has been interested in his boss (the head defender) but it wasn't very obvious. They have good chemistry and friendship, but I kinda thought they dug eachother. She had a little bit of a jealous moment and he FINALLY picked up on it, though she denied it. And then he said this:

If you were to say you were available, no other women in the world would exist.

OMG.

Always get a home inspection

ALWAYS. Sadly, we are cancelling our offer on the house. We had our inspection on Sunday--well, not even a real inspection. He didn't even go inside. He saw signs of water damage outside, most likely a defect from when the house was built 10 yrs ago. The inspector had seen these signs before, and thought it was going to be pretty severe. The only way to really check was to get special permission to make holes in the walls and look for moisture. Basically, he thought the flashing in the windows was installed wrong, or the stucco was put on poorly. It was just too much to even think about dealing with. Every window had water staining, especially the windows at the back of the house (3 bedrooms, family room/kitchen). The window that was replaced upstairs was most likely because they thought it was leaking, but really it was the wall seeping. I am thankful we had such a great and honest inspector, and that we didn't get a surprise after we moved in. It really could have been a mess and cost us a ton of money--like taking off all the stucco and replacing all windows, and dealing with any mold which could have meant replacing boards. You do not want structural issues in a house. So, we have to start looking again.

Looking at houses was fun in the beginning. Now I am just tired of it. I have probably seen 50+ houses, and only been excited about a few. Hardly any (hardly) are move in ready. We can only take on so much with a baby on the way, and wanting to keep money in the bank for any emergencies. I'm sad Ethan won't get his 4 car garage, and might have to settle for a 2 car which I know won't make him happy. It will also mean I will have to find other places to store things if we don't have that extra space.

In other news, 3 yrs ago today was my due date with Ryan. So, wait about 12 more days for the real thing :) I also found out that the hospital I'm supposed to deliver at doesn't offer epidurals, they only do spinals. From what I've researched they are usually used for c-sections. You are numb higher, but its only one injection. They don't leave the tube in. Its one injection and it only lasts for about 2 hrs. With Ryan it was about 5 hrs from the time I got the epidural til Ryan was born. I'm not sure I could hang on that long and wait for the spinal. I'm going to check with my OB at my next appt and see what she says. Its possible I might have to switch hospitals which means switching doctors almost midway through my pregnancy. I'm ok with it, but I wonder if its weird to switch because I want the option of an epidural.

Look, I scrapblogged my header!

I hope no one plans on me doing anything productive (like doing 3 days of dishes) because I am busy on scrapblog.

What else is going on? I got a flu shot Monday. Exciting. I did my research and both my primary and OB said to do it. Apparently getting the flu during pregnancy is very dangerous for the baby. No side effects, other than a sore arm for a few days. Next up is the AFP blood test. Because the 8 (count them 8) I have already given was not enough. I don't go back to the doctor for 3 weeks, so I'm watching the scale, hoping it doesn't go too out of control. I still haven't had any french fries, but man, I'm adddicted to the turkey/bacon/avocado on sourdough at a local deli. YUM.

Nothing new on the house. We still don't have a signed contract, though they have our deposit in a cashier's check. The inspections should be scheduled for next week, but not until we see some signed docs. As of right now the house is still active on the market and I don't like that. As soon as we get an escrow number that should all change, but there are still people walking through my house! They were so quick to accept our offer (2 days) and want a quick close, but they seem to be lagging in drawing up the "final" paperwork. Ethan and I figured out how much money we can spend on repairs and the new flooring. Its important for us to keep money in the bank for an emergency fund (you go Suze Ormon) so if the repairs are too much, we have to say goodbye to the house. It will be sad, but not as sad if Ethan lost his job and we had no savings.

Ryan is experiencing serious 3 yr old anxiety. He worries if I will pick him up from school, he worries Ethan won't go in and get him in the morning. It is a cycle of him asking the same thing over and over, us reassuring him, then he asks again. It is exhausting. I have told him we will ALWAYS get him, then modified it to add grandma or grandpa or auntie or uncle. So many people love him this kid will never be left anywhere. I'm assuming its another 3 yr old control issue. Today at the pumpkin patch, after we did all the scheduled stuff with the preschool everyone split up. No way you can keep about 20 preschoolers together for too long. Ryan was so worried we lost his teacher. We had to go find her so he could see she was still there. I was chopped liver I guess. I kept thinking, how am I gonna do something like this with 2 kids. Ryan has been disobedient lately, and one of the things he is doing is running from me. I HATE THAT. DESPISE. He has rarely ever gotten a spank, but that is one thing that sets me over the edge. Especially when he is running from me in a crowded area. Am I supposed to 4-wheel with my stroller or bounch my little baby in the bjorn as I run after him? He will even run from me at home which is lame. He is trying to take a toy with him to time out (on the stairs). Not sure why he thought that was ok. I know, consistency consistency consistency. Workin on it.

My beef and rice caserole just beeped, and Ryan will be home soon from an afternoon of playing with uncle and grandma and grandpa. My brother is so awesome and is gonna be a great dad. This was his first week "out in the field" as a deputy sheriff and he has Thurs/Fri off. He called me this afternoon to see if he could take Ryan. Um...yes! Then ofcourse they go to grandpa and grandmas, but still, me home alone. Ethan is working late, Ryan will have already eaten dinner. I will be up all night because I took a nap...darn naps.

The House

So, that is Ethan's dream house with the 4 car garage. The one that needs all new flooring up the stairs and the entire second floor (minus bathrooms). The house that needs to be entirely repainted on the inside, at least the second floor before we move in. The house that is gonna be work work work. We got the call Friday evening that they accepted our offer, but countered for a 5 day inspection period and wanted to close escrow on Nov. 14. Everything is electronic and we told our agent to "click" yes and we were ready, though we were pretty sure we wouldn't close on the 14th because title and escrow are never on time. Ethan didn't think we would have a problem funding the loan in that time, and we were assured we could get the inspections done in 5 days.

My mom drove by the house on Saturday and called to let me know "there are people in your house!" Because the final contract had not been drawn up, the house was still listed as active. Ethan asked the agent to take us to the house on Sunday during the day because we saw the house at night. The house still had electricity, but some of the rooms were missing fixtures so we couldn't see everything. I already had plans for an in home spa party in Sacramento so I couldn't go.

Ethan took a bunch of pictures and when I asked him if it was good or bad he said he would tell me later. Never a good answer. Turns out there is some water damage in the master bathroom. He thinks its a confined area but with that stuff you never know. They also noticed a lot of random wiring and exposed wiring, along with tons of missing fixtures so we're probably going to need an electrician to come in and help with that. There is a water line that is cut, and they can't figure out if its the main or not. They usually turn the water off in foreclosure properties, but not cut the pipe. So...everything depends on the inspection. We put less money down this time because we new we were going to have to pay for new flooring and a stove, plus random stuff so hopefully the inspection doesn't find stuff that is very expensive.

This also will change our move in date. Even if we close on time, its going to take a few weeks to do the flooring, painting, and whatever else they find. Ethan was hoping we could be out of here Nov. 30 and not have to pay rent for another month. I on the other hand think we should pay our December rent and take this nice and easy. We don't really have the capacity to move in a weekend like we used to do. I can't pack anything heavy or move anything heavy, Ethan hates to pack...issues. He mentioned getting movers and I said that was the only way we could do it quick, but that still would only give me 2 weeks to paint (not me paint), clean and get new floors upstairs. I'm a mom and we're pretty magical, but I'm not sure I'm that kind of a miracle worker.

Today we are turning in our "addendum" that is a standard foreclosure form that basically says they will pay for nothing and they will charge us $250 for every day we don't close on time, which will officially open escrow, change the listing to pending, and get people to stop looking at our house. We had to add another addendum because Ethan is a licensed agent, though he is not affiliated with a broker and hasn't worked in real estate in the last 2 yrs, but we had to disclose that.

I am trying to be optimistic about it all. During Judy's home buying process she said she had to put good thoughts out there, so I'm gonna do that. It is a great house, has great bones, and we will not outgrow it. I have to believe its the house for us, where else do you get a 4 car garage in town? I have my family around to help with all the other stuff so I just gotta let everything else go and have a good attitude.

This might be our house

Details to follow...( you are lucky I was able to find the photos after Ethan downloaded them on the computer).

1989

Thanks Judy, I graduated 8th grade in 1989...I'm pretty sure I was only a fan in middle school. I do remember them having a new song in high school because I was driving when I heard it, but I was no longer a fan. I HAD MOVED ON. Promise.

Where was I last night?

At the NKOTB concert!!!! Oh, how I have dated myself. But at least I was not there in a fluorescent shirt and a side pony tail. I'm not exactly sure what they were thinking (crimped hair also) because I liked NKOTB in middle school, and I graduated 8th grade in 1998 so I'm pretty sure the fluorescent/side pony tail days were long gone. One of my favorites was the two guys with the "MY WIFE MADE ME GO TO THE NKOTB CONCERT" t-shirt. Hilarious. And I really felt bad for them until I saw them under the spot light and they were dancing. We had a great time trying to figure out why men were there. Sometimes it was obvious. For example, if they were wearing a new NKOTB concert t-shirt before the concert even started...or hand made a NKOTB 08 jacket. Ya, obvious. But there really were some guys there for their wives/girlfriends. Maybe they were the designated driver for the 30 something crazy woman in their life living out her adolescent crush. You could spot those guys because they sat down the entire time or they stood there was definately no body movement at all. I'm happy to say I was not the oldest person, nor the only pregnant person. One of my friends was pregnant as well, over 20 weeks, so I was in good company.

I am happy to report I did not know any of their new songs, and was just there to relive my middle school obsession. They are just as cute as ever, if you though they were cute before. They are appreciative of their fans, and did a long show. Natasha Beddingfield opened up for them. Ethan likes her but too bad for him because not only would he not step foot in that concert, I don't even think he would have dropped me off in the parking lot.

One of the members (Danny if you care) mom passed away from breast cancer so they have a specific shirt where all the proceeds go to the Komen Foundation. I thought that was fantastic, except it was $35 for a tank top that I would never wear outside my house.

All in all it was fun, I danced, I sang. I got to hang out with friends. I got home at 1am and never really fell asleep. I drank caffeine at dinner so I would stay awake and it worked too well. Only 4 more hrs til nap :)

Let's make an offer!

We saw three houses last night, two that we really liked. It was about time. I was excited about them both, then got some info that has us leaning to a specific house. But...the details.

House #1

1) MOVE IN READY. No lie. Even the carpets looked brand new. For a foreclosure, that is unheard of. You have no idea the icky carpets I have had to walk across. Ew.

2) Some Pergo flooring downstairs (we are anti carpet but know we need to deal)
3) 2 closets in the master
4) Ethan's beloved master sinks are separate
5) good upstairs layout so no kids room will be right next to ours
6) 3 car garage (yay for Ethan!)
7) spa in the backyard w/ deck
8) great neighborhood and local school, lots of parks
9) Totally in our range

The cons. No grass in the backyard. The spa, though I always wanted one, with kids it makes me nervous, though in general I think its safer than a pool. This will easily be fixed with a locking spa top, and the deck is raised so we can gate off the deck as well. But still, another thing to worry about. It also needs a stove.

House #2

1) Huge, 5 bedrooms and good layout w/ a great kitchen/family room
2) large backyard w/ grass and cement
3) 4 car garage (Ethan described it as heaven)
4) all tile or pergo downstairs
5) great neighborhood, local school is a "magnet" school, several parks in walking distance
6) master has 2 closets
7) pantry in the kitchen!

Cons. Needs new flooring on the stairs and the entire second floor. Also needs a new AC unit. House had it but they took it with them. Should be fairly easy to buy a new unit and hook it up since the wiring is all there. But, come next summer will be an issue if its not done yet. Needs new paint throughout. There are some funky colors and flower wallpaper border...ick. Also needs a stove and some tiles replaced in the kitchen. Other than the flooring we could move in (after a good clean) and deal with stuff one thing at a time.

I wanted the MOVE IN READY easy way out, but you should have seen the twinkle in Ethan's eye when he stepped out into that garage. Its a 2 car, with a 2 tandem, and there is another separate single garage door that leads to the backyard. Really, he could live out there. We could park 2 of our 3 cars and have ample storage to make him happy. He doesn't ask for much. Then we got some info saying we have a good chance so we are making an offer tonight. Supposedly this bank does a quick turn around so ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

As for my brother's video, I'm not sure I can post it because he is in uniform. I'll check.

Conversation with my doctor (who i now kinda hate)

Dr: You are putting on the weight fast. You gained 7 lbs (8 total on their scale) in 4 wks.
B: Yes, I know. Not good.
Dr: I don't mean to harp. I just don't want you to be unhappy. If you are only going to gain 25lbs you've gained too much too soon.
B: (in my head) who decided I was only going to gain 25? isn't that a bit unrealistic when I gained 40 last time?

Trying to sound repetent: I need to exercise more.

Dr: No, you need to eat less. You are not eating for 2. All of this weight is going on you, not the baby.

B: OK (wanting to cry)

Then it took a while to find the heartbeat which is nerve wracking, but all is well. And apparently I am now an emotional eater because I went across the street to the new Target that I love and bought a bag of Archer Farms salt & vinegar chips and ate some on the way home. Cuz that helped, I'm sure. I also bought a food stacking hamburger play thing for Ryan's birthday. He has been into "cooking" lately but his daddy won't let him get a play kitchen. So, I decided he could get some play food. This one is also a stacking game so its cool, and it has an electronic menu and it will tell you in what order by color or name, etc. how to stack the hamburger. Love it! I also looked at the play cooking stuff. $20 for a few small pans and a pink oven mit. No thanks. Because I am my mother's daughter, I went to the housewares dept. and looked at their sets. I can get a name brand set of 30 pieces (some I could use for myself with a tray) for $20. Ryan would love that even more because they are real. I'm excited about that. So, I think a few more food pieces, and the Bosch kids drill set I got him and he is good to go for his birthday!

And just for fun, my brother got tazered at work yesterday. It is not a requirement but he decided to do it. Talk about dedication. The video is hilarious though.

3 yr old = bipolar & has anyone refinished furniture?

I was commenting to Kalyn's post and asked "are all 3 yr olds bipolar?" and I thought I would answer myself with a resounding YES YES YES.

Ryan has less than a month to go before the big birthday, but I would say the last 3 months have been pretty difficult attitude wise. They have also been some of the most fun, as I listen to him explain things to me and show me things. I love listening to the conversations he has with himself and his toys. His hand gestures are hilarous! The way he reasons things out-or at least tries to- shows me that his little brain is working overtime. It was about 10 months ago that I made the call to the speech clinic and reported to the intake coordinator that my 22 month old son had no words. Zero. The language explosion of the last year has been amazing, but at the same time, has caused me to wonder about the difference between a true delay and just stubborness. Can you have a diagnosed delay of 1 yr but then be age appropriate after 5 months of therapy? I know there was a delay, at 2 he should have had many more words than he had, but what was the underlying cause? Lately, as his stubburon streak has come out I tend to think that was a big chunk of the problem. There never was a cognitive issue, as with most other delays. Usually when there is one problem there is another. As I watch this new 3 yr old attitude, the bi-polar, I know its normal because it seems everyone else is going through it too, but I still don't like it. It would not be abnormal in this house to have 5 time outs in one hour. It would not be abnormal for Ryan to get time outs for the same behavior in a row.

I cannot ignore (but sometimes have to force myself to remember) the loving party of the bi-polar 3 yr old. The unsolicited hugs and I love yous. When he asks me to play with him and actually shares his favorite train without me asking. The way his voice goes up at the end of him asking "mom, wanna go outside with me?" Watching his excitement when his daddy comes home and he goes through a very confusing story about what he did that day. Just hearing him speak is magnificent. I have to remember that we only have 6 more months of just him and I during the day. I just asked him if I could have a kiss and he said "um, yes you can."

Onto furniture. When we finally move I need to do something to our bedroom furniture. Ethan will not allow a new purchase, I won't even ask. That whole if its not broke mentality. My parents bought our set as a wedding gift, so it is now 9 yrs old. I picked it ou, and have no idea how I ended up with it. It is not my style, am I don't think it was ever close to a style I might have once had. Its rustic pine. I was having a phase where I wanted wrought iron on it, which it does have, but really, what was I thinking? I'll post a pic later, but that would require me making the bed and Ethan still has to hook up the camera cord to the computer.

I have thought of trying to re-finish it, going to a darker stain. The problem with that is that its knotty pine and I think it would be hard to cover the knotty parts because they are darker than the other parts. Another option would be to paint it white, but that would feel country to me I think, and nothing good comes of white in this house. My other option seems to be to actually paint it a dark brown, or possibly black. So, let me know your furniture changing experience.

The housing mess

I'm starting to think we need to pick a date, and if we haven't found a house by then, we need to stop looking. I cannot imagine being hugely pregnant or moving with an infant. It would not be terrible to stay in this house for a while longer. We love the neighborhood. We would have to do some moving around as in the guest room/craft/junk room needs to be a baby room and where is that stuff going? Its going in the office, but Ethan doesn't know that. The office is kind of his space and he is very particular about what it is in here. It would be nice to move before the baby so we could get stuff like this arranged and settled. I had already told him that all of the "baby" stuff could go in the baby room and not the garage, and I would find a way to make it work. Needless to say we have a lot of stuff--we haven't gotten rid of anything, which is good, and bad. Our garage is full and I know it drives him crazy. But why would a jumperoo, 2 swings, bouncy seat, bath tub, bath seat, high chair, smaller high chair, and an entertainment thingy that looks like the big red car from the Wiggles bother anyone? Oh, and the pak n play. And about a gazillion diaper boxes full of boy clothes. Obviously if we get a 3 car garage it will not have 3 cars in it.

We considered changing our search criteria, looking in some older neighborhoods. We could almost pay cash and not have a payment, or at least a very small payment. The joy that would be, but then it keeps coming back to being snobs about neighborhood or schools. We drove around today and saw some nice houses and hope to get to view them soon. The neighborhoods were nice. They just weren't as nice as we had been looking at, the schools aren't new. Really, it shouldn't matter. There was a house I thought Ethan would love because it had a 3 car garage but he said he couldn't even look at it because of the color. I had him drive me by and it is green, but not lime green. Its actually a nice green, not what I would choose for the outside of my house, but not bad. I've seen much worse. I don't want to be those people on House Hunters (HGTV) I hate because they don't like a house because they hate the color of the bathroom. I know stuff can be changed. I just want to fall in love with a house and it really hasn't happened. The one we really liked and put an offer in on twice is back on the market. Fell out of escrow--again. We are letting it go this time. The comps in that neighborhood are going at least 20% over asking price and asking price is all we can pay for that house.

A Ryan funny. We were on the way to the grocery store and he said he saw birds. I asked him what they were doing and he said "flying." Duh. He even had the tone like "are you kidding me?"

In another interesting development, two of Ethan's co-workers want us to name the baby after them. Everyone thinks we are having a girl. I have no clue yet. I am still waiting for a dream like I had when I was pregnant with Ryan. Nothing yet. But, their suggested name was Kristy Dawn...I informed Ethan that it sounded a bit like a stripper wearing daisy dukes. Then my sister called me today and said she had a dream that she saw a bulletin on Myspace that I had the baby and her name was Brianna Dawn. Again with the Dawn? I promised her Dawn was nowhere in the running , and Brianna probably isn't either, just because Ethan's friend's daughter is named Brianna--but you never know. I don't hate it and that was the first criteria to finding Ryan's name. This really is why we need to know the gender. It will take us the remaining months to figure out a name. And have a back up. Except back ups tend to screw you up if you start to like them more than the favorite....oh my.

That was kinda whiny

I realized my last post was kinda whiny (though true). Thanks for the ideas. It is time to start with the underwear again, though I'm lacking a bit of motivation. Mostly because my back has been killing me for 2 days. It is time to bust out the insurance book and see if chiropractic is covered. I also need to buy more underwear because I found out Ethan threw a bunch away. Apparently that was his way of cleaning up a mess--more than once. Charming.

And I ate 3 donuts today. I'm blaming it on cinnabon for not being open. I dropped Ryan off at school then went to the jumpy place for our playgroup's charity fundraiser. We are doing the pajama program (you may have seen it on Oprah). This is our second year in a row. I had heard our food court just got a cinnabon so I was very excited, except at 9:30 they still weren't open yet and I could not wait any longer.

Because my last post was whiny, I thought I would list some of the things that went pretty well for us as first time parents, so it doesn't seem like everything has been a total struggle. Who knows, maybe some one will be jealous of me! Or not, we did have that sleep issue...

1) Great in the car - by great I mean fantastic, superb, terrific, awesomly awesome. from the time he was born until now it has been lovely. i will not be embarassed to say i prayed for a healthy baby that was good in the car. i knew we would be driving north a lot to see family and there was no way i could handle 8 hrs in a car with a screaming child.

2) Drank from a bottle with no problem - after we found the right bottle. no fancy stuff for this boy. he was all about the playtex w/the ugly brown nipple. Avent or Dr. Brown...oh please. he would not deal with that kind of nonsense.

3) Bye bye bottle and binky - cold turkey my friends. We never looked back. At one year and a few days he was bottle and binky free. Our sleep consultant made us do it, but we did it and were so surprised. The day I quit hand washing bottles and looking for pacifiers was a great day.

4) Sleep from age 1-2 - glorious. Before 1 is not even discussable right now due to the fact I am pregnant and it will make me scared. 1-2 was blissful. 2 got rocky, and still is, but again, I cannot deal with that right now. Just bask in 1-2 and only getting up 4x to check on him because he didn't put himself back to sleep within 10 min. 4x in a whole year! And he slept from 6-5...those were the days.